"Woman," my husband said. "I got you a present."
"Cool," I said. "What?"
A little while later, a dump truck arrived in our driveway. It had a nice pile of steaming mulch to deliver. The driver dumped that thing and took off. Nice.
"There you go, woman," my husband said. "Now get mulching!"
Ugh. Yeah. That's the nicest thing anyone has ever gotten me. Thanks a lot, honey!