"Mama," my ten-year-old son said. "I have some good advice for you."
"Oh yeah?" I said. "What?"
"Never jump out of an airplane that somebody is living in."
I tried not to laugh. "Okay. Why wouldn't you want to do that?"
He gave me the explanation. "I saw this on the show, Ten Major Fails. A man sky dived out of an airplane that his friend was living in, and Coke cans got stuck in his parachute. The parachute didn't open when he jumped."
I tried to visualize this situation. I couldn't really imagine how that would've happened, but I guess stranger things have occurred. "So what did the guy do?" I asked.
"He activated his backup. But that one ended up having a hole in it."
"That sounds bad," I said.
"Lucky for him, he had a burrito."
"A burrito? How did a burrito help him?" I couldn't imagine where this story was going.
"He used the tortilla part to cover the hole."
I raised my eyebrows and nodded. "Did he land safely?"
Bubba shook his head. "No. He crashed through a glass ceiling into his high school reunion."
"You're kidding, right?" This sounded like the biggest fish tale ever.
Bubba shook his head. "No. I'm serious. He wanted to make a big entrance."
A big entrance, indeed!
So, ladies and gentlemen, here is the profound bit of advice I got out of that conversation: If you ever jump out of an airplane, make sure it's not one somebody is living in, don't land on a building, and make sure you have a burrito with you. It could save your life!