The Cast and the Chainsaw

It was cast removal day for my daughter.  She had broken her wrist about four weeks ago.  Now it was time to get it off.

"Mom, my friends at school said they use a chainsaw to get it off.  They said my arm is going to bleed."

"That's not true."

"Yes it is.  My best friend said so.  And she doesn't lie."

"Do you really think they're going to hurt you as they take off your cast?"

"Yes!"

We drove to the doctor's office. 

"I don't want to go in."

"Okay.  No drama," I said.  "Let's just go in, get this done, and go home."

Of course there was drama.

The nurse came in, and my daughter made a fuss.  "Are you going to use a chainsaw?"

"No."

"My friend said you will cut my arm."

"No.  I will not cut your arm.  But I might tickle it."

My daughter made a face.

Then the saw came out.  It was an itty bitty rotary saw.  And it made a lot of noise.

My daughter looked petrified. 

But in no time at all, the cast was removed.

"Now was that so bad?" the nurse asked.

"Uh...."

Then the x-rays were taken.  Unfortunately, the break hadn't quite healed.

"No!  I'm not wearing another cast!"

Oy gewalt! 

Reflections on 9-11

Today I'm going to diverge from my usual ramblings about my kids and the creatures that live in my house.  Today, as we near the ten-year anniversary of 9-11, I'm going to share a snapshot of my experiences and reflect on what that day means to me as a mother.

September 11,2001 started as any other.  I remember looking out of the window of my Cleveland home, thinking what a lovely sunny day it was.  I was nine months pregnant with my first child.  The anticipation of becoming a new mother and holding my baby filled me with joy.  I felt her kick within me.

Then the telephone rang.  It was my husband.
    
 "Turn on the TV," he said.  "A plane just crashed into one of the twin towers in New York City."

That was the beginning of the nightmare.  I sat down on the sofa and turned on the news.  A plane had just crashed into the Pentagon.  I knew this was no accident.  Something very wrong was happening.  I watched in horror as the second plane slammed into the remaining tower.  That's when I began to cry.  I cried for the lives that were lost.  I cried for the families- the mom and dads, the sons and daughters of those people who died.  I cried for our country.  And I cried for my unborn daughter.

I didn't know in the days or weeks that followed what the world would look like for my child.  When I finally held her in my arms, I prayed that she would not have to live in fear.  I prayed for a world of peace.

Now, ten years later, we live in a world that has been changed by 9-11.  We don't live in fear, but we are more cautious - more guarded.  We realize that we are not invincible.  We also do not take for granted the freedom we hold so precious.

As a mother, I want my children to know that no matter what hardships may befall us, we can still choose to stand tall and rise above them.  I want them to value their freedom and never become complacent.  I want them to be proud to be American.  These are the lessons from 9-11.  These are the thoughts that we must hold close to our hearts as we continue to rise from the ashes.

    

Bone Museum

My husband made a nice rack of ribs for our Labor Day celebration.

The kids gobbled them right up.  Not a scrap of meat was left on those bones.

My seven-year-old son had a pile of about eight bones sitting on his plate when he was done.

"Make sure you throw those in the garbage," I said.

"No.  I'm saving them."

"Why are you saving bones?"

"I have a collection."

"You do?"

"Yeah.  For my bone museum."

The German Shredder Strikes Again

"Mom, the picnic table is knocked over and the umbrella is in pieces!" my nine-year-old daughter announced, looking out the window.

"Uh oh," I said.  I walked over to the French doors and looked out.  The table was indeed on its side.  The chairs were knocked over, and the umbrella was most definitely in pieces.  The culprit?  Our wonderful German Shepherd "puppy."

"Schultz!"

He ran to to farthest corner of the backyard.  He knew he was in serious trouble.  I grabbed the dog by his scruff and hauled him to his crate.

I think it's time for the shock collar!

Sugar Water

My nine-year-old daughter was rummaging through the refrigerator, trying to find something to drink.  She stumbled upon a Gatorade container with liquid inside.

Now, this Gatorade container was supposed to have an orange beverage inside.  The label was clearly marked. 

My daughter didn't seem to notice that little detail.

She poured herself a glass  and guzzled it down.

I saw her when she was putting the container back.

"Did you just drink that?" I asked.

"Yeah, why?"

"It's not Gatorade."

"It's not?"

"No.  It's hummingbird water.  See, it says 'hummingbird water.'"

She turned a pale shade of grey.  "Am I going to die?"

"No, but you might have a little buzz.  That stuff was sugar water."

"No wonder it tasted good.  I'm going to have more!"

Not!

Blueprint for a Jet Pack

"Mommy," my seven-year-old son said, "I made a blueprint for a jet pack that would fly a million people!"  He waved a notebook paper with scribbley lines and stick figures on it in front of me.

"Really?  Tell me about it," I said.

"You need 10 metal poles, 641 wooden planks, 10 plastic sticks, and a rope.  See - the poles fit together and the rope ties here."

"I see."

"It's as big as a playground, that's why it can hold a million people."

"Uh huh."

"Oh, and I forgot one more important thing."

"What?"

"The smiley face sticker that goes right in the middle!"

Doggy Toy

This morning, I took my German Shepherd out to go potty.  As soon as he was out the door, he noticed a locust lyiing on its back on the patio.  I knew that poor locust didn't have a chance.  The varmint poked him with his big snoot. 

The locust buzzed.

The dog pounced.

The locust buzzed again.

"Hey, dumb locust.  Just stay still and he'll leave you alone," I said.

Apparently, the locust didn't understand a word I said.  It buzzed again.

The dog pounced.

And that was the end of the locust.