Prehistoric Pets

Our pet supply has dwindled over the last year.  We used to have 26 pets (most of those were fish).  Now we have three:  a cat, a dog, and a frog.  My nine-year-old son didn't think that was good enough.  So when we went to Barnes and Noble book store and spotted a kit for growing triops, my son insisted we buy it.  (Who knew you could find pets at a book store?)

A few days ago, we set up the aquarium (these are water creatures).  We emptied half of the egg packet and waited for something to happen. Today something happened.  Three baby triops hatched.  What the heck is a triop?  Let me show you:

Isn't it cute?  Don't you want to snuggle up next to it?

Right.

Triops were around during the time of the dinosaurs.  Somehow they managed to survive global warming and environmental pollution.  Now let's see how long they survive in my son's room!


Hope you all have a very Happy New Year!  Best wishes for 2014!

Ghosts in the Gold Mine

Thank you to all who visited during the 'Tis More Blessed Giveaway.  Milo James Fowler is the winner of my books.  Congratulations, Milo!

I took my kids gold mining in the northern hills of Georgia.  We had a great time.  Our stash amounted to fifteen flakes of gold, so I guess we'd better not quit our day jobs!  While we were on the underground mine tour, we heard a lot of tales about ghosts.  Apparently quite a few folks died in the mine.

Our guide led us to a dark area.  "Right in this very spot, the ceiling collapsed, killing all the workers under it.  The supervisor was standing over there."  He pointed to an area about twenty feet away.  "He was so mortified about losing his workers, that he went home and didn't eat or drink.  He died in about a week or so.  It's said that his ghost comes back to take care of those he lost.  So keep your eyes out for him."

That little speech totally freaked out my nine-year-old son.  "Mama, do you think that's true?"

"I don't know, Bubba.  But if it is, I doubt you're going to see him."

Bubba wasn't so sure of that.  He stayed close by my side as we walked through the cold, damp tunnel. After a while, he stopped.  "Look, Mama.  What's that?"  He pointed to a shadow on the wall. It wasn't very big, but it was an unusual shape.

I shrugged.  "Let's check it out."  I walked over to inspect.  "It's a ghost."  I said.

Bubba's eyes got big.  "Really?"

"No, Bubba.  Not really.  It's a bat.  See?"

I pointed at a cute fuzzy thing hanging from the ceiling.

Bubba breathed a sigh of relief.  "Oh.  It's just the ghost's pet."

'Tis More Blessed Giveaway and The Stink Zone

I know I'm a day early for this, but tomorrow I'm going gold mining with the kids, so ya'll are getting an extra day to participate.

Every Friday in December, as part of the 'Tis More Blessed Giveaway, hosted by Milo James Fowler, I have given away free copies of both of my books (That Mama is a Grouch, and That Baby Woke Me Up, AGAIN) to one lucky winner. This is the last Friday of the month, and therefore the last chance to win.   Even if you already have copies, feel free to participate, because they could make great gifts for anyone you know.  Just leave a comment below for a chance to win.  These are hard copies of my book, and I am willing to mail them anywhere in the world.  Be sure to visit Milo to find out who else is participating and have a chance to win their books as well.

Now for the story:

My twelve-year-old daughter is a girly girl. She likes makeup, fashion, and perfume.  So for Christmas, I had the brilliant idea to get her a perfume-making kit.  I don't know what I was thinking, but it sounded like a good idea at the time.

She opened the package and discovered fourteen vials of oils, ranging from woody, to citrus, to floral smells.  "What do I do with these?" she asked.

"I think it would be a very good idea to read the directions and find out ."

She made a face and popped open one of the vials.  She gave it a good sniff.  "Ugh!"  she said.  "This smells like poop!"

I looked at the bottle.  Musk.  "That doesn't surprise me," I said.

She grabbed a citrus vile labeled, "Lemony."  She opened it up and took a whiff.  "Better."

Meanwhile, I had picked up the instructions and started reading.  I knew the girl wasn't going to do it, so I figured I'd better give her some guidance.  "Okay.  Here's a sample recipe.  You need five drops of Lemony, one drop of Mella, and six drops of Finalia."

She picked up a vile and suctioned up five drops.  She put it in the mixing cup.  "Mom," she said after she sniffed it.  "This doesn't smell like Lemony."

I took a sniff.  "Nope.  I think it's Mella."

"What do  I do?"

"Multiply all the totals by five."

I let her do her thing.  When she was done, I sniffed the finished product.  "Whoa.  That's strong!  What the heck did you put in there?"

"Fifteen drops of Lemony, twenty five drops of Mella, and six drops of Finalia."

I shook my head.  "Girl, do you not know how to multiply?"

She grinned.  "Yeah, but I think something is wrong with my nose, because it stinks in here and I can't smell a darn thing!"

(Uh huh.  And apparently sitting in the stink zone has adverse affects on one's brain, thereby decreasing one's ability to do math!) 

Cup Games

At my son's school Christmas party, there were a variety of games - toss the marshmallows through the wreath into the bucket, Hershey kiss unwrap, candy cane hook, and jingle bell jump.  It was my job to man the snowball ping pong game.  Kids were supposed to bounce a ping pong ball into plastic red cups. 

I stood behind the table, ready to catch whatever balls came my way.  Easy, right?  Wrong!  Not when you have six kids lined up with balls, all bouncing them as high as they could.  Those wild balls went everywhere!

"Hey," I said.  "Can we do a tamer version of this game? How about one at a time, and try to aim for the cup."

They thought about that.  Then my son had a brilliant idea (go figure!).  "Let's play bowling!"  He grabbed the cups, lined them up, and rolled the balls, knocking them down. 

"Okay," I said.  "This is interesting."  It went smoothly for a while, but then the balls and cups started flying everywhere.

I sighed.  "Time for another game."

Another kid had an idea.  "Let's make a cup castle."

Everybody thought that was great, so they made a towering masterpiece.  Which worked just fine, until another kid decided that it was time for an earthquake to strike.  The tower toppled over.

"Anybody else have a brilliant idea for what to do with cups and balls?" I asked.

We went through a bunch of games, including, "guess which cup the balls are under."

Finally one little girl grabbed a cup.  "Cup song!" she announced.  She did a lovely rendition of the infamous cup song, after which everyone segued into the "What does the Fox Say?"

Cup, cup, cup, cup cup, cup, cup cup cup cup, cup cup cup cup cup, cup!

Oy!


Merry Christmas, everybody!  Hope you enjoy the day with your families!

Winner of the Giveaway and Conch Phones

Thank you to all who visited my blog and commented during the 'Tis More Blessed Giveaway.  The winner of my books is Kristy Marie Feltenberger Gillespie  (Wow, that's a mouthful!)  Congratulations, Kristy!  I hope you enjoy the books!  There will be one more chance to win next Friday, so be sure to stop by.


Now for the story.

My nine-year-old son brought out a couple of conch shells and handed one to me.  "Mama, talk into this quietly."

I held it like a microphone and started talking.

"No, Mama.  Like this."  He put his conch shell up to his ear like a telephone and started talking.

I looked at him kind of funny.  "Don't you need some kind of connecting wire between the two shells for it to work like a phone?"

He shook his head and spoke into his shell.  "Can you hear me?"

"Yes, Bubba.  I hear you."

He walked into the other room and did the same thing.  "Can you hear me?"

"Yes, Bubba."

He came back to where I was.  "Mama, conch shells are perfect phones.  They echo real far, so you don't need wires!"

Okay.  Maybe I should suggest using conch shells to the telephone companies.  Then we can all walk around with shells plastered to our heads!   

'Tis More Blessed Giveaway and an Award

Every Friday in December, as part of the 'Tis More Blessed Giveaway, hosted by Milo James Fowler, I am giving away free copies of both of my books (That Mama is a Grouch, and That Baby Woke Me Up, AGAIN) to one lucky winner.  Even if you already have copies, feel free to participate, because they could make great gifts for anyone you know.  Just leave a comment below for a chance to win.  These are hard copies of my book, and I am willing to mail them anywhere in the world.  Be sure to visit Milo to find out who else is participating and have a chance to win their books as well.


I'd like to thank Deanie Dunne and Susanne Drazic for giving me the Wordpress Family Award.

The rules for this award are:

1. Display the award logo on your blog.

2. Link back to the person who nominated you.

3. Nominate ten others you see as having an impact on your WordPress experience and family.

4. Let your ten family members know you have awarded them. That’s it!  Just make sure these people have taken you in as a friend/family member, and then spread that love!

 

Here is my list of ten bloggers.  All of these people visit my blog regularly.  Special thanks to them for always stopping by and leaving comments!  If you don't know any of these people, be sure to visit them.  They're awesome!

 

Dana

The Happy Whisk

David Walston

Dezmond

Janie Junebug

Pat Hatt

Crystal Collier

Liz Blocker

Holy Ghost Writer

Heather Holden

 

 

 

Underwear Overhead

I'm always complaining about my family members not cleaning up their dirty clothes.  I don't understand why it's so difficult for them to get their things off the floor and put them in the hamper. 

Well, today my husband had a brilliant solution to the problem.  I walked into my bedroom and looked up.  Hanging from the ceiling fan, was a pair of underwear, an undershirt, and a pair of socks.

"Really?" I said.

My husband came in with a huge grin on his face.  "They're not on the floor, are they?"

He had a point.  But I bet it took a lot longer to get those things on the fan, than it would've taken to walk over to the hamper and toss them in!