My son left a little present in the toilet for me two days ago. I didn't find it until today. (He's been out of town with his dad.) When I walked in the bathroom, I was assaulted by a putrid odor.
"Ugh! That's disgusting!" my daughter said when she got a whiff of it. She immediately ran and found two bottles of perfume. She sprayed a half a bottle of one, and a half a bottle of another.
"What are you trying to do?" I asked. "Kill me?"
"No, Mom. That's the worst smell I've ever smelled in my life! I'm trying to cover it."
I plunged some more, trying to get the toilet unblocked. It took me a full hour to get that thing to flush.
Meanwhile, my daughter got three more cans of air freshener and sprayed them. Then she got some Lysol and Scrubbing Bubbles and sprayed those.
It smelled absolutely awful. Even Schultz, our German Shepherd, was gagging. (I quickly let him out of the house so I wouldn't have any other messes to clean up!)
As I finished cleaning up, my daughter came with yet another bottle and started spraying.
"That's enough, already!" I said. "We're going to end up with lung cancer breathing all these chemicals!"
"But Mom, it's water! I'm cleaning the air, now!"
(So ladies and gentlemen, if you were planning to visit my abode today, I would highly advise that you do something else. I have opened all the portals, and am now abandoning the ship!)