It was my son's half-birthday today. To commemorate the occasion, I baked a cake. Normal people would use a boxed mix. But I'm not normal. I have to do everything from scratch. Anyway, I pulled out the sugar and measured it. Only the trouble was that the sugar was in a hard lumpy form. I don't know what happened to it, but I didn't feel like going to the store to get a new bag. So I beat it. Literally.
"Mom," my son asked. "What are you doing?"
"What does it look like I'm doing?"
"Um, killing the sugar?"
I finished beating that stuff and got it pulverized pretty good. I made the cake, which actually turned out well.
As we ate it, my daughter made an interesting comment. "Mom, next time can you make it denser?"
I looked at her funny. "Why?"
"I'd like to conduct a science experiment and throw it off a cliff."
"What?" I asked, incredulously.
"Yeah. We can test its mass by the amount of splat it leaves."
And I thought I was being violent with the cake!