Crashing Through the Road Blocks

Today, I decided to infuse my frog-loving son with some culture.  I took him to a theater to see a production of Annie.  The show was great, but the trip getting there was an epic adventure.

The theater was pretty much in Timbuktu.  It was about an hour away from where I live, in a place that I was completely unfamiliar with.  As luck would have it, our way was blocked.  The sign read:  "Road closed one mile ahead."  A detour sign pointed toward an alternate route.

Okay, I thought.  No problem.  I'll just follow the  signs, and I'm sure I'll figure it out.

Ha!

I followed the signs down one road, and then down another.  Finally, the detour sign pointed down a road that clearly looked like it was closed.  Typical Cincinnati signage.  But I followed it anyway.

"Mama," my son said.  "I don't think you're supposed to go down here."

"Sure I am," I said as I passed by the road baracades. "The sign said I should go this way."

I weaved in and out through orange barrels and pylons, bumping along the dirt road.  Nobody else was on it, so I really didn't care.

"Mama," my son said, sounding real nervous.  "This isn't right.  I don't want to be here."

I looked in the rear view mirror.  "Okay, buddy, I'll turn around."

So I did.  And I double checked to make sure the detour sign was pointing down the road I had just been on.  It was.

I went back to the original road and decided to try my luck going down it.  All was well for about two miles.  Then the barriers were up, and the road became a dirt path.

"Oh good," I said.  "Another off road experience."

I plowed through that thing, hoping to find a side street to turn off.

"Mama!" my son said. "What are you doing?"  

"Going to the theater.  What does it look like I'm doing?"

The poor kid was ready to have a heart attack.

To make a long story short, I did manage to get to the theater by finding a side street and zig zagging through the town.  And I did it with two minutes to spare.  Am I good, or what?

(Note to self:  I need to get a smart phone or GPS system!)    

Old Cheese

Before I tell my story, I have to take care of some unfinished business.  A couple of you asked to see a picture of Evelyn, our new pet tree.  Here she is:

Isn't she pretty?



Now for the story.  This morning, I took our big German Shepherd, Schultz, for a walk.  He likes to sniff around and munch on whatever he may find.  This usually does not amount to much.  Today, however, was a different story.   His big old snoot landed on a pile of white stuff.  Apparently he thought it smelled pretty good because he started munching.

"Schultz, drop it," I said. 

He didn't listen.  He kept munching. 

I listened to the crunching sounds as he chewed whatever he had found.  I couldn't imagine what on earth it was.

Finally, I pulled Schultz away from the pile and inspected it.  Do you know what it was?  Dried string cheese.  Disgusting!

I don't know how he managed to eat that stuff without vomitting, but let me just say, I'm kind of nervous about what's going to come out the other end!         

Tricky Chicken

Today I decided to try something a little different for dinner:  Chicken Kiev.  For those of you who have no idea what this is, it's a chicken breast stuffed with a buttery sauce.

I put the dinner in front of my kids and told them to eat it.  My son cut into it first. Guess what happened?  The sauce squirted right up his nose!

"Mama!" he yelled.  "What the heck?"

My daughter was next.  She cut into it and got a nice squirt on the shirt.  "Mom!  Why do you have to always have these stupid food experiments?  Why can't you just make normal things like macaroni and cheese?"  

"Okay.  I'll make mac and cheese tomorrow - with cauliflower thrown in."

Hee hee. 

A Tree Named Evelyn

"Mom," my daughter said.  "I saved a tree!"

"You saved a tree?"  I asked.  "How did you do that?"

"I put it in a pot."

"That's a good trick," I said.  "Did it fit?"

"Yeah, it's just a baby.  Look."  She walked me over to a pot that was sitting on the kitchen counter.  Inside was a young pine tree.  Under the whole thing was a sign:  Evelyn.

"This is Evelyn the tree?"

"Yeah.  Isn't she cute?  Daddy was going to run her over with the lawnmower, and I saved her life.  Can we keep her?"

"Yes we keep her, but she has to go back outside in the spring."

So now ladies and gentlemen, we have a new pet in the house:  a tree named Evelyn.    

Gifted

My daughter is a typical teenager.  She always has the music cranked up in her room, and when she's not in her room, she has earbuds in her ears listening to iPod music.

This evening, she came downstairs rapping to one of Nicki Minaj's songs.  I couldn't understand a darn word she was saying.  (I probably didn't want to , either.)

"How the heck do you learn that stuff?  It sounds like a bunch of jibberish," I said.

"I learned it all in two hours."

"Two hours?"  I couldn't believe it, because there's no way I could learn it in two hundred years. "You should spend that time on your school work," I said.

"But Mom," she said.  "I is already doing fine in school.  I is gifted."

Yeah, you is!

Let's Go Fly a Kite

"Mama," my eight-year-old son said.  "I'm going to go fly a kite."

"I thought your kite fell apart last year and ended up getting tossed," I replied.

"It did.  I'm going to make a new one."

Okay.  I knew this was going to be interesting.

It was indeed interesting.  I went out to the garage about fifteen minutes later and discovered my son playing with his fishing rod.  At the end of the line was a paper dangled from the hook.

"Do you like my new kite?"

I looked at that thing.  "Does it fly?"

"Yeah, watch."

We went out into the wind.  The paper blew into the air and whipped around, just like a kite.

Impressive!  

Crazy Daisy Award

Tara Tyler stopped by the other day, and gave me a pretty flower.  She must've known how much I like flowers.  Thank you Tara!

For this award, I have to tell you seven weird things about me.  That shouldn't be too hard to do, because you probably already know how crazy I am!

Here we go.  Seven weird things:

1.  My cell phone is 10 years old.  Ancient!  I think I need to get with the program.

2.  I never attended a rock concert until I went to see Taylor Swift two years ago, with my daughter (although I had seen plenty of orchestra concerts).  Truthfully, although Ms. Swift was a fantastic performer, I wouldn't want to go to another concert.  Even with earplugs, it was way too loud, and it hurt my ears!

3.  When I was in college, I used to practice the viola 6-8 hours a day.  Crazy, huh?

4.  I write all my manuscripts by hand before I type them into the computer.

5.  I am allergic to most cats.  Oddly, I am not allergic to my own, although he's a tabby - one I should be allergic to.

6.  I don't like pop/soda, coffee, or beer.

7.  I never thought I'd be an author.

Told you I was crazy.

Now I'm supposed to pass this on.  Let's see.  Who of you out there is crazy?

1.  Junie Junebug  I don't know if she's crazy, but I just love this lady!  She even offered to make me chicken soup when I wasn't feeling good :).  So I just had to give her a daisy!

2.  Pat Hat  This guy is definitely crazy!  (Sorry, Pat, you are!)  But his rhymes are so funny.  Sometimes they're a little off color, (you've been warned), but it never ceases to amaze me the stuff this guy can pull out of his hat.

3.  Crack You Whip  This lady has a great sense of humor.  You have to stop by and read some of her stuff.  ( I don't know if she's still blogging, because her last entry was in August, but you can still get a laugh over some of her previous posts.)

That's all I'm going to list.  If any of you want this award because you're crazy, or because you just like flowers, feel free to grab it.

  

Builder Boys

"Mama," my eight-year old son said.  "I'm going to build a house on the hill in our backyard."

"Okay," I said.  "I'm sure it will have a great view."

I watched the boy go to work.  He had his toolbox and shovel.  I watched him collect tree branches and rocks.  I could tell this was going to be a masterpiece.  Soon, my son's buddy came over.  He decided to pitch in, too.  It was a major production. 

The boys worked diligently.  Schultz, our German Shepherd, stood by the door and watched all this activity with great interest.  I could tell he wanted to join in.  Finally, I let him out of the house.     He ran like a madman over to the construction site.  As soon as he got there, he picked up a  giant branch.  He trotted around the yard with that thing in his mouth. 

"Schultz!"  my son yelled.  "Stop it!"

Schultz didn't listen.  So I went outside.  "Come here, Schultz."  The big furry beast pranced over to me with the branch swinging from side to side.  I led him to the construction site.  "Drop it," I said.

The dog dropped the branch right in place. 

"See," I said.  "He just needed some on the job training."

Finding Nemo

First of all, I'd like to say thanks to all of you who stopped by for author, Virginia Wright's guest post.  You left some wonderful comments for her!  The winners of the giveaway are Winnie and Vanisha.  Congratulations!

Second, my commenting and posting here is going to be sporadic for the next few days.  We're having our entire house painted, so our main computer is down, and our Wi Fi connection is not always available.  I'll do my best to post and comment on everybody's blogs, but if I'm not here, you'll know why.

Now, for the story.  A couple of months ago, one of our angelfish disappeared.

"Mama, where did it go?" my son asked.

"I don't know," I said.  "Maybe it went into the castle and died.  Fish do that sometimes."

I never saw the body, so it was a bit of a mystery, until yesterday.  We had to move the fish tank so that the painters could get to the wall behind it.  And guess what was lying on the floor behind it?  Yep.  The dead angel fish.  Apparently he wanted to head for the open sea, like that fish in the movie, Finding Nemo.  One of his buddies decided to jump out of the tank, too.  So there were two dead fish on the floor.

My husband looked at them and laughed.  "They should've watched Finding Nemo to figure out a better way to get to the sea!"

Yeah, something like that.  I personally think they got a look at Schultz's big head when he stuck his snoot by the the tank.  He probably scared the heck out of them, and they died trying to escape!

Mama Drama

I have concluded that I am a certifyable nutcase.  But you probably already knew that. 

So here's what happened.  My husband decided that we needed to unload stuff we hadn't used in a year or two.  That was fine.  I agreed to go through things and come up with a pile for donations.  One of the things my husband wanted to get rid of, was a huge pink Victorian doll house that my daughter got from her grandparents when she was five years old.  This thing weighs at least 40 pounds.  It's made of wood and has all kinds of cute wooden Victorian furniture in it. It was also custom-designed by my daughter.  She had picked out the floor patterns and wall paper to match our first house - the house where she was born.

My mother-in-law, a nice lady from Poland, was so happy to give this to her granddaughter.  "I never thought I'd be able to give my grandchildren something this nice," she had said with tears in her eyes. 

I told her I would pass it on to her great-grandchildren.

It didn't look like that was going to happen, because the doll house now sat in the donation pile.  I wasn't too happy about it, but I understood that a forty pound doll house that wasn't used anymore was a big thing to lug through life.  "I'll ask the neighbors if they want the doll house for their girls."

I marched to the neighbor's house with my daughter, and asked them if they wanted it. 

"Sure," they said.  "We'll be over in a little bit to look at it."

Meanwhile, my daughter and I went home and took pictures of the doll house that was now in our garage.  My daughter told me about how she picked out the wallpaper.  And about how Grandpa picked out the wallpaper in one room.  And how she didn't like his choice.  But now she does.  And I remembered playing dolls with her when she was little.  And then I remembered  our old  Victorian house - the one I never wanted to leave.  And I remembered what Granny had said. 

I started to get a little emotional.  

A little while later, the neighbors came over with their girls.  Of course the girls liked the house.  "We'll go get our car and take it to our house."

Fine.  I went back in my house and hid in the office.  I didn't want to see it go.  My husband happened to notice that I looked a little upset.  "What's the matter?" he asked.

"I just don't want to get rid of the doll house," I said.  "Too many memories.  Or maybe I'm just being hormonal."

"Are you pregnant?"

Huh?  Was I that bad when I was pregnant?   Okay, maybe I was.

"No.  As far as I know, I'm not."

"Should I go out there and tell them we changed our mind?"

I didn't want to disappoint the little girls who thought they were getting a doll house.  "No," I said.  "Just let them have it."

Then I had a meltdown.  I was just so upset about that doll house.

"Okay," my husband said.  "We won't get rid of it.  Apparently this thing means a lot to you."  He went outside when the neighbors arrived and told them we changed our mind.  Fortunately they were cool about it.  We gave the girls some talking stuffed animals to make up for it.  They were thrilled.

So now the doll house sits in our basement to collect dust for the next twenty years.  Am I crazy, or what?

Genre Favorites Blogfest, Author Virginia Wright, Giveaway

It's a busy place at my pad, today! First, we have the Genre Favorites Blogfest, hosted by none other than Ninja Captain, Alex Cavanaugh. Then we'll have an interview with children's author, Virginia Wright, and then if you'd like, you can be part of Virginia's book giveaway.

So let's get started! For this blog hop, I'm supposed to tell you my favorite genre of music, movies, and books, and then add a little guilty pleasure to the mix.

Favorite Music: Classical! I am a professional musician, so this kind of music is my life. I prefer music from the romantic period (Beethoven, Brahms, Mendelssohn, Tchaikovsky), but on piano, I love playing the music of Debussy, which is from the impressionistic period.

Favorite Movies: Chick flicks. Wat can I say? I'm a female and I love sappy love stories that make me cry.

Favorite Books: Middle grade fantasy. I'm a big kid who never grew up. I love reading this stuff, and I love writing it. Books like Rick Riordan's Percy Jackson series, or Harry Potter, or some of Kate DiCamillo's books are right down my alley.

Guilty Pleasure: I'd have to say sitting down with a box of dark chocolates, watching a romantic chick flick would be it. Good thing I don't have much time to do it, or I'd weigh like two tons.

What about you? What are your favorites?

On to the interview with Virginia Wright. (This is a repost from yesterday, so if you've already read it, you can skip to the end. The giveaway goes until September 19th.)

I am very excited to introduce you to Virginia Wright, children's author, and one super-nice lady!

About Virginia:

Born and raised in Belfast, ME, children's author Virginia Wright began her writing career at an early age in a diary with lock and key given as a gift by her mother.After graduation from high school in 1976, she took coursework in journalism and writing. Later, as a mother and homemaker, her writings were published in local publications and newspapers, as well as online. A military family, the Wrights have lived in countries all over the world and in seven different states. Her five grandchildren and being a preschool teacher in Mississippi gave her inspiration to write children’s book.

Books to check out:

•BuzzzzzzzzWhat Honeybees Do (2010)

•CryingBear (2011)

•ThePrince and the Dragon (2010)

•ThePrincess and the Castle (2010)

I asked Virginia some questions about her writing career. Here's what she had to say:

1.Tell us a little bit about your background and how you became a children’s book author.

Ever since I was a young girl― I put words to paper. I can remember sitting on the veranda of my parent’s house writing, first it was a little diary with a lock and key, later, as I started growing up it was a pen and pad in hand—back then, I wrote mostly Poetry and Haiku’s. My excitement for writing was realized in 1981, when I sold my first writing to a regional publication Washington County Magazine, but the excitement for writing didn’t stop there, it continued to grow!

That is so cool that you started writing when you were a kid, and that you're still doing it and love it!

2. What do you like most about writing for children?

While I consider myself a mixed genre writer, children’s writing has definitely taken front and center the last couple of years. What I like most about children’s writing the reactions from children when they listen to my stories and turn the pages of my books. If I see their smiling faces, it was all worthwhile to me.

Aren't kids the best? I love that, too!

3. Tell us about Crying Bear Yes Bears Cry Sometimes Too. What inspired you to write it?

Crying Bear was the name of a stuffed bear that I had when I was a little girl, and she became the inspiration for the title of my latest children’s book. Crying Bear was a furry red, chubby bellied, stuffed bear. It had tears that were manufactured on the face that ran down onto the cheek. A very special little toy of mine for certain.

Description: Join this very adventurous little bear cub, as she wanders too far from the den in the snow covered mountains of Maine.

I've read Crying Bear. It's a sweet book! It's nice to know about the inspiration for it.

4. The world of children's book publishing is extremely competitive with many authors hesitating between trying their luck with a traditional publisher or self-publishing. What advice would you offer writers who are oscillating between these two publishing venues?

My personal best advice to authors trying to decide between traditional publishers or self-publishing is to― just write! Then for inspiration, Google John Locke, Amanda Hocking, and Colleen Hoover. John Locke is the eighth author in the world, and the first self-published author in history―to have sold 1 million eBooks on Kindle! All three of Amanda Hockings books in her Trylle Trilogy-Switched, Torn, and Ascend-were originally self-published, but were later re-released with St.

Martin’s and Pan Macmillan Internationally. Her trilogy also made the USA Today Bestseller list, the New York Times Bestseller list and was recently optioned for a film. Colleen Hoover self-published her book, Slammed and in just a few short months signed a contract with Simon & Schuster.

Self-publishing was taboo just a few years ago and self-published authors were shunned by traditionally published authors. Now, many self-published authors are widely accepted in the writing community and publishing world.

With that said, self-publishing is definitely worth a try, especially putting words into digital format (e-Book), because who knows…one day a traditional publisher may come along and offer you a seven-digit book deal that is too good to pass up. I’m still waiting on mine, and I never give up hope. **Smiles**

I'm still waiting for that seven-digit book deal!

5. Do you have any other works in progress?Can you share a little about them?

I’m looking forward to the release of my next children’s book, The Christmas Secret, in late fall 2012.It feels like it is working into a Christmas classic to me—it is about two little boys, Mikey and Charlie, who learn the real meaning of giving through one boy’s selfless act.

I’m not sure where my writing will take me after that, I have given some thought to write a Young-Adult (YA) fiction; perhaps, a cookbook, or maybe a romance novel is in the works too. Stay tuned…

I can't wait to see your new book. Good luck with your other writing endeavors!

To one commenter I will be giving away an autographed paperback copy of Crying Bear! To another, I will give away a copy of my non-fiction, Buzzzzzzzz What Honeybees Do, in eBook version.

Thank you for having me as guest author this week.

-Virginia Wright

You're welcome. It was fun having you here!

There you have it.  If you are interested in receiving one of Virginia's books, please say so in the comments.  Thanks for stopping by!

Guest Author: Virginia Wright Interview and Giveaway

 

Today we have a first at my pad. A guest author! Drum roll, please.

I am very excited to introduce you to Virginia Wright, children's author, and one super-nice lady!

About Virginia:

Born and raised in Belfast, ME, children's author Virginia Wright began her writing career at an early age in a diary with lock and key given as a gift by her mother. After graduation from high school in 1976, she took coursework in journalism and writing. Later, as a mother and homemaker, her writings were published in local publications and newspapers, as well as online. A military family, the Wrights have lived in countries all over the world and in seven different states. Her five grandchildren and being a preschool teacher in Mississippi gave her inspiration to write children’s book.

Books to check out:

• BuzzzzzzzzWhat Honeybees Do (2010)

• CryingBear (2011)

• ThePrince and the Dragon (2010)

• ThePrincess and the Castle (2010)

I asked Virginia some questions about her writing career. Here's what she had to say:

1. Tell us a little bit about your background and how you became a children’s book author.

Ever since I was a young girl― I put words to paper. I can remember sitting on the veranda of my parent’s house writing, first it was a little diary with a lock and key, later, as I started growing up it was a pen and pad in hand—back then, I wrote mostly Poetry and Haiku’s. My excitement for writing was realized in 1981, when I sold my first writing to a regional publication Washington County Magazine, but the excitement for writing didn’t stop there, it continued to grow!

That is so cool that you started writing when you were a kid, and that you're still doing it and love it!

2. What do you like most about writing for children?

While I consider myself a mixed genre writer, children’s writing has definitely taken front and center the last couple of years. What I like most about children’s writing the reactions from children when they listen to my stories and turn the pages of my books. If I see their smiling faces, it was all worthwhile to me.

Aren't kids the best? I love that, too!

3. Tell us about Crying Bear Yes Bears Cry Sometimes Too. What inspired you to write it?

Crying Bear was the name of a stuffed bear that I had when I was a little girl, and she became the inspiration for the title of my latest children’s book. Crying Bear was a furry red, chubby bellied, stuffed bear. It had tears that were manufactured on the face that ran down onto the cheek. A very special little toy of mine for certain.

Description: Join this very adventurous little bear cub, as she wanders too far from the den in the snow covered mountains of Maine.

I've read Crying Bear. It's a sweet book! It's nice to know about the inspiration for it.

4. The world of children's book publishing is extremely competitive with many authors hesitating between trying their luck with a traditional publisher or self-publishing. What advice would you offer writers who are oscillating between these two publishing venues?

My personal best advice to authors trying to decide between traditional publishers or self-publishing is to― just write! Then for inspiration, Google John Locke, Amanda Hocking, and Colleen Hoover. John Locke is the eighth author in the world, and the first self-published author in history―to have sold 1 million eBooks on Kindle! All three of Amanda Hockings books in her Trylle Trilogy-Switched, Torn, and Ascend-were originally self-published, but were later re-released with St.

Martin’s and Pan Macmillan Internationally. Her trilogy also made the USA Today Bestseller list, the New York Times Bestseller list and was recently optioned for a film. Colleen Hoover self-published her book, Slammed and in just a few short months signed a contract with Simon & Schuster.

Self-publishing was taboo just a few years ago and self-published authors were shunned by traditionally published authors. Now, many self-published authors are widely accepted in the writing community and publishing world.

With that said, self-publishing is definitely worth a try, especially putting words into digital format (e-Book), because who knows…one day a traditional publisher may come along and offer you a seven-digit book deal that is too good to pass up. I’m still waiting on mine, and I never give up hope. **Smiles**

I'm still waiting for that seven-digit book deal!

5. Do you have any other works in progress? Can you share a little about them?

I’m looking forward to the release of my next children’s book, The Christmas Secret, in late fall 2012. It feels like it is working into a Christmas classic to me—it is about two little boys, Mikey and Charlie, who learn the real meaning of giving through one boy’s selfless act.

I’m not sure where my writing will take me after that, I have given some thought to write a Young-Adult (YA) fiction; perhaps, a cookbook, or maybe a romance novel is in the works too. Stay tuned…

I can't wait to see your new book. Good luck with your other writing endeavors!

To one commenter I will be giving away an autographed paperback copy of Crying Bear! To another, I will give away a copy of my non-fiction, Buzzzzzzzz What Honeybees Do, in eBook version.

Thank you for having me as guest author this week.

-Virginia Wright

You're welcome. It was fun having you here!

Funky Hair-do

My daughter came downstairs this morning with a rather interesting hair-do.

"Why is there a pencil sticking out of your head?" I asked.

"Mom!" she huffed.  "Get with the program.  Everyone wears pencils in their hair."

I looked at Bubba.  "Do you wear pencils in your hair?"

He shook his head.  "No, Mama.  That's stupid."

I looked at my husband.  "Do you wear pencils in your hair?"

"Does it look like I wear pencils in my hair?'

Um, no.

I looked outside at the girl riding her scooter around and around and around.  She didn't have a pencil in her hair, either.

I looked at my daughter.  "Are you sure you got your facts straight, because I don't see anyone wearing pencils in their hair."

"Mom, every girl in my class wears pencils or sticks in her hair."

Okay, then.  I guess it's the new tween fashion trend.  Maybe I should put my hair in a bun and shove a  pencil through it.  Then I'll be cool.

Milk Mustache

I think I found a new milk mustache model.  "Who is it?" you ask.  It's none other than Schultz, our big furry German Shepherd! 

My daughter was eating dinner, and moving way too fast.  I've never seen anyone eat dinner, talk with her hands, and dance with her feet all at the same time.  But that's what she does. Usually we don't have any incidents as a result of this bizarre behavior.  Today, however, her luck ran out.  My daughter knocked over a full glass of milk.  It spilled all over the table and dripped on to the floor.

Schultz was right there to save the day.  He flicked out his big pink tongue and licked it off the table.  Then he took care of the floor.  When he was done, he had a nice white milk mustache on his black snoot.

"Good boy, Schultz!" my daughter said. 

He cocked his head and wagged his tail.

I'm just hoping he's not lactose intolerant, because if he is, the mess he's going to make will be a lot worse than the spilt milk!   

Fruit Flies: Part 2

Yesterday, we discovered we had a fruit fly infestation.  My husband concocted an apple cider vinegar poison which knocked a lot of them off.  But they kept coming.

"Okay," I said to my husband.  "These things are proliferating, and we got rid of all our fruit and vegetables.  Where are they coming from?"

My husband shrugged his shoulders.  "I don't know," he said.  "But I don't like bugs in my house!"  

Yeah.  I don't either.  I like animals, but not bugs. If these things weren't stopped, we'd have about a thousand little buzzer pets.  Not good!

So we went on a search.  We looked through the kitchen.  There were a couple flying around, but nothing significant.  We looked in the family room.  None in there.  Then we looked in the laundry room.  That's where they seemed to be hanging out. 

"Why would they be in here?" I asked.  "There are no bananas in here."  Or were there?

Our laundry room serves as a mud room.  The kids toss their coats and shoes and backpacks in there when they come in the house.  My husband noticed my daughter's pack back hanging on the hook.  A bunch of fruit flies were congregating around it.  Uh oh.

He opened it up.  "Augh!!!!!" he yelled, and nearly vomitted.  "There's a rotten peanut butter and jelly sandwich in there, and a swarm of fruit flies!"  He quickly ran out of the house with that thing and tossed it in the outside garbage.

"Somebody's in trouble for this!" he exclaimed.

When my daughter came home from school today, I asked her about the sandwich in the backpack. 

"Oh, yeah," she said.  "We had a picnic at the lake when we went fishing, and I forgot to take it out of the backpack when we came home."

Oh, yeah.  Just a minor detail.  "Well, young lady," I said.  "Next time, don't forget!"        

Bye Bye Fly!

We had a visitor in the house today.  Actually, we had quite a few visitors.  These were the six-legged variety, also known as fruit flies.  They must've hitched a ride on a banana from Venezuela or something.  The first one was kind of cute.  I named him Auzz.  Then I saw his buddy.  I named him Buzz.  Then there was Cuzz, and Duzz, and Euzz.  By the time I met Zuzz, I realized these little guys weren't just here for a visit.  They had brought their suitcases and were moving in.

"Hey," I said to my husband.  "We have a little problem here."  I showed him the army of fruit flies.

"Time to declare war!" he said.  Then he went back into his office.

What the heck? I thought.  I guess I was supposed the fight the varmints myself.  So I got out a can of Raid and sprayed.  Auzz and his friends took off.  I didn't see them for a while.  But a few hours later, there they were again.

"The problem is still here," I called to my husband.

He came out of his office.  He went to the cupboard and got out a bottle of apple cider vinegar.  Then he got out a glass, a ziplock bag, and a rubberband.  He poured the apple cider vinegar into the glass, covered it with the ziplock bag, rubber banded it to the glass, and poked a tiny hole in the center.  Then he walked back into his office and shut the door.

"This is your idea of a war?" I asked.

"Woman. I'm the expert."

I shook my head and went about my business.  An hour later I came back into the kitchen where the glass was placed and looked at it.  And guess what?  Auzz, Buzz, Cuzz, and Duzz were taking a swim in there.  And Euzz, Fuzz, and Guzz were hovering around, watching.

Pretty good.  So if you ever have little visitors of the fruit fly variety, go get yourself some apple cider vinegar, a ziplock bag, and a rubber band.  They'll be gone in no time.

 

Happy Birthday, Schultz!

Guess who's birthday it is?  Yep.  Our big furry German Shedder/Shredder is two years old!  Two years of trouble.  So let's recap what this beast has done.  He's destroyed our grill, chewed our kitchen chairs, tromped my flower gardens, drank my mother-in-law's coffee, ran away from home four times, tried to eat my violin, jumped in the bathtub with my son, eaten my husband's wallet and credit cards, and drank water from the toilet.  I'm sure I missed a bunch of stuff, but I think you get the idea of what a fine pet he's been.

To celebrate the occassion, we had a birthday party.  (No chocolate at this one!)  We got the beast a squeaky red rubber ball (pictured) which is his new favorite toy (can you tell?).  We got him four new bones, and invited his best friend, a white lab named Charlie, over for a play date.  Those two had a blast romping around the yard, chasing each other, and sniffing each other's behinds.

When it was all done, Schultz snuggled with his ball, and had a nice long nap.   I think he's gearing up for the terrible two's.  Let's see what kind of trouble he can get into this year!    

Can't Get Enough Chocolate!

 Welcome to the "What's Your Chocolate?" blog hop! 

When I saw this topic, I knew I had to get involved.  I love chocolate!  My favorite is dark chocolate.  I think it's an addiction or something.  In fact, I've been known to go to the store, get one of those baker's chocolate bars, and eat a few squares.

My kids, apparently, have inherited the "I love chocolate" gene.  A few weeks ago, we took a little trip to Cleveland, Ohio to visit some friends and family (that's where I'm from).  Cleveland, Ohio is home to Malley's, the most awesome chocolate candy store in the USA.  (Malley's, for you trivia fans, is the candy store that invented Sweetest Day.)  Of course, we had to visit that place.

"Mama," my son said as we walked in, "I want one of everything."

"Yeah, me too," I replied.  "But we're not getting one of everything."

"Mom," my daughter said.  "Let's get a hot fudge sundae."

That sounded like a great idea, so that's what we did.  When we were done, my son had chocolate all over his face, and even some on his shirt.  I chuckled.  "Come on, let's go get some more chocolate."

Seventy-five dollars later, we left Malley's with a big bag of chocolate.

My daughter grinned.  "Mom," she said.  "I know what kind of birthday party I want."

"What kind?" I asked.

"A chocolate one."

That sounded good to me.  So, in a couple of weeks, we are going to have a chocolate-themed birthday party for my daughter.  On the list is a chocolate fountain, chocolate brownies, chocolate cake, and chocolate milk.  Anybody want to come? 

What Color is That Bear?

My son came home today with a pink stuffed teddy bear. He had won it from one of those machines with the claw that grabs the toys.

"Dude," I said.  "Nice pink bear!"

"Mama," he said.  "It's not pink.  It's light blue."

I looked at that thing.  It was most definitely pink.  I called my daughter over to get a second opinion. 

"Yeah, it's pink," she said.

My son frowned.  "Are you sure?"

I nodded.  "Yep.  Apparently light pink is a color that you can't see very well." 

My boy is color deficient.  He can't see colors the way most people do.  So pink things look blue, and yellow things look green.  Interestingly, his favorite color is yellow.  He doesn't even see what yellow really looks like.  To him, it's lima bean green.   

Anyway, now I have to make sure he doesn't leave home with his pink teddy bear.  His buddies would really wonder about that.  (Unless they're color deficient, too!)

Gifted Eyeballs

All of you parents out there know how much fun it is helping your kids with their homework.  This year, it's at a new level for me.  My daughter is in the "gifted" program, and her homework is rather challenging.  Today, I was trying to help her with her math assignment.  She's taking a course on DaVinci Vision, and it has something to do with proportions.  Anyway, she had to look at an animated chart from some tracker software on the computer.  She had to analyze the fraction/decimal ratios. 

"Mama," she said.  "I don't get it.  Can you help me?"

I walked over to the computer and stared at the flashing yellow and white chart.  The numbers, first of all, were microscopic.  Second, the chart was flipping back and forth so fast between the decimals and fractions, I could barely read anything.

I couldn't help it - I just started cracking up. 

"Mom, this isn't funny.  Why are you laughing?"

"Well, girlfriend.  For this course, you have to be gifted mentally and physically," I said.

"What are you talking about?"

"Mama  might have a brain in her head, but she most certainly does not  have gifted eyeballs!"

Zombie Mom

Well folks, I hate to say it, but I've been sick for the last four days.  I guess all that bushwhacking wore me down.  My body couldn't handle an attack from some itty bitty bacteria and I fell apart.  The good news is, I went to the doctor and got a good dose of powerful antibiotics.  The bad news is that I look like...well, I won't say what I look like, but it isn't good.

My son saw me in my decrepid state.  "Mama," he said.  "What's wrong?  Your eyes are black."

"Really?"  Last time I checked they were blue with some red bloodshot veins popping through.

"Yeah.  You look like a zombie."

I looked in the mirror.  There were dark circles under my eyes.  Maybe that's what he was talking about. I had to chuckle at his comment, though.  "Bubba, I don't look like a zombie.  I look like a vampire!"

My son considered that.  "No.  You look like a vampire zombie."

All right then. 

So, ladies and gentlemen, if you see me running down the highway, acting kind of strange, the best advice I can give you, is to get away as fast as you can!  There's no telling what I might do.   

A Little Bowl of Ice Cream

I was helping my son with his homework when my daughter came up to me.  "Mom, guess what I just did."

"What did you just do?" I asked.

"I just ate a whole cereal bowl of ice cream!"

"You did what?"  I couldn't believe my ears.

"Well, I went into the freezer to find some desert, and I saw the cherry cordial ice cream.   It looked so good, I couldn't resist.  So I got a cereal bowl and filled it to the top, and ate the whole thing."

"Oh my gosh."  I didn't know what else to say. 

"So now I have a huge ice cream headache."

I looked at that girl.  "Yeah, and you probably have a huge ice cream belly ache!"

She grinned.  "I'm not having deserts for two weeks."

Yeah.  How about two years!

Very Inspiring Blogger Award

I would like to give a heartfelt thanks to Medeia Sharif for bestowing the "Very Inspiring Blogger" award to me.  If Medeia had not already been selected, I would have definitely chosen her for the award.  She is one disciplined writer!  She's also a very nice person - always featuring other authors on her site. If you don't already know Medeia, be sure to visit her!




If you get this award, here are the rules:

1.  Thank the person who nominated you.
2.  Nominate bloggers whom you find inspiring
3.  List seven things about yourself

Inspiring Bloggers:

1.  Dana - She's such a warm and friendly lady, and her Sunday Inspirations are truly inspiring!

2.  Christine Rains - Christine is one busy writing mom.  She's an amazing lady!

3.  Journey of Life - Always has great thoughts and fabulous places to visit.

4.  Arlee Bird - Well, this A-Z challenge creator is a blog master.  I don't know how he has time to write so many blogs and keep up with all the commenters.  Definitely inspiring!

5.  Alex Cavanaugh - Captain Ninja himself.  Is he not inspiring?  If you don't know him, go meet him.  You'll be inspired!

6.  Michelle - This lady has a way with words.  She can take a writing prompt and turn it into something amazing!

7.   Archna Sharma -  Her poetry is magic.  You have to read it!


Useless Information About Me You Probably Never Wanted to Know

1.  I never broke a bone until I had kids.  Now I break toes all the time, tripping over my kids' and husband's clutter. 

2.  I can do a headstand, but I couldn't do a cartwheel if my life depended on it.

3.  I am Hungarian and Norwegian.

4.  I'd rather read than watch TV.

5.  I logged over 1000 dives when I was a SCUBA diving instructor.  That's a lot of time underwater!

6.  Skydiving is on my bucketlist.

7.  I'd like to visit Antarctica before it melts. 

So there you have it.  Inspiring bloggers, and uninspiring info about me.  I hope you get to visit these great people.  I'd love to add all of you, but if I did, this post would be ridiculously long!

Guest Author: Virginia Wright

Today we have a first at my pad.  A guest author!  Drum roll, please. 

I am very excited to introduce you to Virginia Wright, children's author, and one super-nice lady!

 About Virginia:

Born and raised in Belfast, ME, children's author Virginia Wright began her writing career at an early age in a diary with lock and key given as a gift by her mother.  After graduation from high school in 1976, she took coursework in journalism and writing. Later, as a mother and homemaker, her writings were published in local publications and newspapers, as well as online. A military family, the Wrights have lived in countries all over the world and in seven different states. Her five grandchildren and being a preschool teacher in Mississippi gave her inspiration to write children’s book.

 

Books to check out:

 

•             BuzzzzzzzzWhat Honeybees Do (2010)                        

•             CryingBear (2011)

•             ThePrince and the Dragon (2010)

•             ThePrincess and the Castle (2010)

 

  I asked Virginia some questions about her writing career.  Here's what she had to say: 

1.  Tell us a little bit about your background and how you became a children’s book author.

 
Ever since I was a young girl― I put words to paper. I can remember sitting on the veranda of my parent’s house writing, first it was a little diary with a lock and key, later, as I started growing up it was a pen and pad in hand—back then, I wrote mostly Poetry and Haiku’s. My excitement for writing was realized in 1981, when I sold my first writing to a regional publication Washington County Magazine, but the excitement for writing didn’t stop there, it continued to grow!

That is so cool that you started writing when you were a kid, and that you're still doing it and love it!

 

2. What do you like most about writing for children?

While I consider myself a mixed genre writer, children’s writing has definitely taken front and center the last couple of years. What I like most about children’s writing the reactions from children when they listen to my stories and turn the pages of my books. If I see their smiling faces, it was all worthwhile to me.

Aren't kids the best?  I love that, too!  

 

3. Tell us about Crying Bear Yes Bears Cry Sometimes Too. What inspired you to write it?

 

Crying Bear was the name of a stuffed bear that I had when I was a little girl, and she became the inspiration for the title of my latest children’s book. Crying Bear was a furry red, chubby bellied, stuffed bear. It had tears that were manufactured on the face that ran down onto the cheek. A very special little toy of mine for certain.

Description: Join this very adventurous little bear cub, as she wanders too far from the den in the snow covered mountains of Maine.

I've read Crying Bear.  It's a sweet book!  It's nice to know about the inspiration for it. 

 

4. The world of children's book publishing is extremely competitive with many authors hesitating between trying their luck with a traditional publisher or self-publishing. What advice would you offer writers who are oscillating between these two publishing venues?

 

My personal best advice to authors trying to decide between traditional publishers or self-publishing is to― just write! Then for inspiration, Google John Locke, Amanda Hocking, and Colleen Hoover. John Locke is the eighth author in the world, and the first self-published author in history―to have sold 1 million eBooks on Kindle! All three of Amanda Hockings books in her Trylle Trilogy-Switched, Torn, and Ascend-were originally self-published, but were later re-released with St.

Martin’s and Pan Macmillan Internationally. Her trilogy also made the USA Today Bestseller list, the New York Times Bestseller list and was recently optioned for a film. Colleen Hoover self-published her book, Slammed and in just a few short months signed a contract with Simon & Schuster.

 

Self-publishing was taboo just a few years ago and self-published authors were shunned by traditionally published authors. Now, many self-published authors are widely accepted in the writing community and publishing world.

 

With that said, self-publishing is definitely worth a try, especially putting words into digital format (e-Book), because who knows…one day a traditional publisher may come along and offer you a seven-digit book deal that is too good to pass up. I’m still waiting on mine, and I never give up hope. **Smiles**

 I'm still waiting for that seven-digit book deal!
 

5. Do you have any other works in progress?  Can you share a little about them?

 

I’m looking forward to the release of my next children’s book, The Christmas Secret, in late fall 2012.  It feels like it is working into a Christmas classic to me—it is about two little boys, Mikey and Charlie, who learn the real meaning of giving through one boy’s selfless act.

 

 I’m not sure where my writing will take me after that, I have given some thought to write a Young-Adult (YA) fiction; perhaps, a cookbook, or maybe a romance novel is in the works too. Stay tuned…

 

I can't wait to see your new book.  Good luck with your other writing endeavors!

 

To one commenter I will be giving away an autographed paperback copy of Crying Bear! To another, I will give away a copy of my non-fiction, Buzzzzzzzz What Honeybees Do, in eBook version.

 

Thank you for having me as guest author this week.

-Virginia Wright

You're welcome.  It was fun having you here!

 

 

 

 

Have a Little Corn with your Butter

To celebrate Labor day, we had a barbecue, which included corn on the cob.

I of course, buttered my corn by cutting off a little pad of butter and spreading it with my butter knife.  My husband?  Well, he's not quite as civilized as me.  He took his ear of corn and rolled it in the whole stick of butter.  My son saw that, and thought that was the greatest thing in the world.

"Can I do that?" he asked.

"Sure, Bubba," my husband said.

I groaned as I watched my boy grab an ear of corn and start rolling.  He rolled.  And rolled. And rolled.

"Bubba," I said.  "That's enough!"

"No, it's not!" he said.  "I haven't even gone through a half a stick."

By the time he was done, he had used up almost the entire stick.

"Bubba," I said.  "Next time have a little corn with your butter!"

Bushwhacked Again, and Again, and Again

I don't know if you recall the 7 Up incident a year or two ago.  If not, here's a quick recap: We were having a party at my house, and I had gotten Seven-Up and Fruit Punch for the drink.  The refrigerator was packed, so I balanced those bottles rather precariously on the shelf.  Well, my husband opened the refrigerator, and out fell the Seven-Up bottle.  The cap popped off, and there was a mighty explosion.  It sprayed everything.  In fact, there are still spots on the ceiling from that little incident.  Anyway, my husband vowed vengeance. 

Let me tell you about his paybacks.  Last month, he had left his suitcases in the middle of our bedroom floor.   I ended up tripping on them and whacking my foot on a chair.  The result was two  broken toes. Let's just say that walking the dog has not been easy!  That was bushwhacking number one.

Yesterday, my husband made dinner.  That was a good thing, because he's a really good cook.  But he doesn't like to clean up the dishes afterwards.  He saves that job for me.  I commenced dishwashing operations and picked up a stainless steel lid that was resting on the stove top.  Little did I know that the burner underneath was still on.  Talk about some serious pain!  My hand blistered up immediately.  "Owww!!!!" I hollared.

My husband came running.  "What happened?"

"You bushwacked me!"

Of course he was very apologetic.  "Now I guess I deserve another bushwhacking."

Yeah.

Fast forward to the evening.  I was tucking my daughter in for bed.  She had to make some final adjustments on her stuffed animal collection, so I thought I would sit down on the floor in front of her bed and rest my broken body.  I grabbed one of her magazines off the dresser and started looking through it.  When she completed her arranging, I put the magazine back on the dresser. 

"Mom, that's not how it goes!"  She jumped off the front of her bed - right onto my leg. More pain!

"What the heck!"  I shouted.

I can't take it anymore!  They're trying to kill me over here.  Somebody save me from the bushwhacking!

All Tied Up

"Mama," my son said.  "I need a new bike."

"What do you mean, 'you need a new bike?'" I said.  The kid had gotten a new bike a year ago, and it seemed to fit him just fine.

"Well, somebody left some 20 pound test line in the way, and it ended up in my chain and wheel."

Uh oh.  That didn't sound good. I went outside to investigate the situation.  What I found was a serious mess.  An entire reel's worth of fishing line was wrapped around my son's back wheel and entwined in his chain links.  "Let me get the sissors," I said.

I came back out and started working on that thing.  Let me just say, it took almost an hour to cut out all that fishing line and get it out of the chain.  When I was done, my hands were covered in black chain grease.  I was not a happy camper.

"Listen here, kid," I said.  "You make sure that 'somebody' doesn't leave fishing line hanging around on the ground anymore, because if that 'somebody' does, this 'somebody' isn't going to be very happy!"