My home has been invaded by trolls, and my big old German Shepherd, Schultz, doesn't like it one bit. What, you say? Let me explain.
Do you remember those Lucky Troll dolls from the 80s -those ugly things with the funky hair that stood straight up? My kids found a bunch of them at a garage sale, and decided they were the cutest things on Earth. They bought about four of them and brought them home.
They plopped the trolls down on the kitchen table a took off to play in the woods. A short while later, Schultz wandered into the kitchen. He started sniffing around. His sniffer led him straight to the trolls. He took one look at those things and gave a little growl.
"Schultz," I said. "You need to relax. They're just a couple of troll dolls."
I walked away. I probably shouldn't have done that, because the next thing that happened, was that Schultz decided to eat one.
"Schultz!" I yelled when I caught him with a tuft of yellow hair sticking out his mouth. "Drop it!"
He didn't want to, but he dropped that thing.
"Listen here, dog," I said. "Trolls are friends. You will not eat a troll!"
He just cocked his big old head and looked at me like I was out of my mind.
Hmmm. Maybe I should've let him eat the troll.